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100WC#14

April19

 

Prompt: put her hand in the box and felt

 

It was an early morning at sunshine rivers.
Megan heard the doorbell, I’ll get it she yelled not knowing she woke up her twin brother.
Megan got the parcel from the parcel man “thank you” she replied. So when everyone was out of site Megan slowly put her hand in the box and felt a bunch of toy trucks and cards and stupid Wii games. Megan thought that can’t be my birthday present but since my birthday is coming up it might be mine. Megan had to come clear to mum. What is my birthday present said Megan…?

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One Comment to

“100WC#14”

  1. April 20th, 2016 at 12:48 am      Reply indigo2014 Says:

    Ebs!
    That was really good I can tell you worked hard on it. First of all it is not “sunshine rivers” it is “Sunshine Rivers.” Next is that there should be talking marks when you said “I’ll get it” and then you need to put in a commer in after “she yelled.” Thank you should have a CAPITAL and after Megan thought you put in a commer. And then in this sentence “Megan thought that can’t be my birthday present but since my birthday is coming up it might be mine.” There needs to be a question mark (if you are talking about it as a question, if not then don’t read on :D) Other then that you did great Ebs! Well done!


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